So that you’d know

I know what I want to be written on my tombstone now. “I love you”.

So that you would know. So that you would remember.

A moment of pure gratitude

I have just been in a week long silent meditation retreat with Bali Usada health meditation. It was remarkable. I shall write about this later. But I want to say this.

During the last moments of the retreat, the last minutes before we left the house, I went up to the meditation room again. No one asked me to do so. No one was even there. I went up. I sat at what used to be my spot. I closed my eyes and went into silence. I said praise.

I went there and sat to offer gratitude. I went there and sat out of gratitude. There was no other intention, nor there was any other cause. I just wanted to say thanks. It was truly, a moment of pure gratitude. It was a beautiful feeling. Nothing but gratitude.

#wishlist: our own little house on the prairie

They say you have to express your wish and let the universe works its magic.

So we sat, chatted and chuckled over this—a list of things of how we want a house to be. Yummy conversation.

A different taste of practice

Recently I decided that I would only write on this blog and not write two (language) versions of every post. A seemingly simple decision with major implications.

It is no longer about a practice[1] in writing. It is about a practice[2] in expressing myself more and more honestly, more and more fully, and more and more naturally.

Practice (noun)
1. repetition in order to improve
2. process of carrying out an idea

Article: Investing gratitude

An article first published in the August 2012 issue of the Jakarta Post Weekender.

Kepada pecinta langit malam

Langit malam memang lebih megah
Bila kita berada di permukaan bumi
Yang jauh dari pijaran lampu dan polusi
Seperti jamaknya tempatku
Dan mungkin tempatmu

Namun langitku kali ini berbeda
Tanah yang kupijak kini
Jauh dari pijaran lampu dan polusi
Langitku legam megah
Berseling gemerlap bintang dan bulatnya bulan

Menyimpan segala rahasia
Yang belum terkuak ilmu pengetahuan
Belum bisa terpapar dalam kata
Walau jelas menghampar belantara rasa
Sebuah misteri maha yang kita tahu ada

Kalau saja kita menyambut bulan lain layaknya Ramadan

Terlalu awal menulis ini? Ramadan baru saja dimulai. Tak apa. Mumpung terlintas. Mumpung teringat.

Entah kenapa, tahun ini saya cukup terkesiap dengan hingar-bingar sebelum dan selama Ramadan. Teman dan kerabat saling menyapa, saling meminta maaf, dan saling mendoakan; serta tak lupa membuat janji untuk buka puasa bersama—kesempatan reuni dengan teman lama.

Masyarakat menyambut gembira datangnya bulan yang karim dan bersemangat untuk memulai puasa. Saking semangatnya, kapan mulai puasa pun ramai diperbincangkan. Media massa semangat memberikan tips puasa dan menu khusus sahur dan berbuka.

Dari kemarin, saya mencoba menyimak kehingar-bingaran ini. Ada sesuatu yang mengganjal di saya.